Pterodactyl Man

“In other news, another man has popped up on our superhero radar. As of this moment no one has seen this mysterious crusader, but terrifying sounds have been connected to small mugging crime scenes and a huge figure running away as the cops arrive. If you have information, call the number at the bottom of your screen. Coming up, what kind of puppy gives the most happiness? This and other stories coming at 5:00.”

They sat around in the secret hideout watching the mid-afternoon news. Nothing happens much during mid-afternoon so fighting crime was kind of useless until later in the evening. The Strong Hands were a tight nit group, they had been together for five years now and when they fought together, their fighting style fit together just like a zipper.  

“Do you think there is anything in this new supposed hero?” Black Belt Matt said, he was sitting in a slumped position on the couch, having a blank look as he stared at the TV.

“Probably not.” Dragon’s Breath replied, “It’s most likely another lonely guy dressing up in a costume and finding recently deserted crime scenes.” He and Missouri Madame were playing ping pong in the corner.

“Maybe we should still look into it. No new villains have popped up lately and we are just settling petty skirmishes between drug dealers now.” Black Belt Matt moaned.

“You say that as if it is a waste of time. I think it is a good endeavor, considering we are still putting criminals behind bars.” Replied Heat Wave as he walked out of the kitchen carrying a plate of toast. You would never need to buy a toaster with him and Dragon’s Breath around. The brothers could heat up anything you could ever want.  

“It’s not a bad thing it’s just, I’m so bored!” Black Belt Matt tipped over onto the rest of the couch, lying as spread eagle as he possibly could be.

“Thanks Belty, now you’ve jinxed us.” Missouri Madame called as she served a new ball.

“I doubt it. Because of us, this town will probably never have a super villain again.” Black Belt Matt moaned once more, changing the channel to Sports Center.

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Across town, a young man slams the door and clicks on the TV. Another boring day of work had just finished and he had preparations to do.  If only those at work knew who he really was, they wouldn’t make him do as much paper work as they did. 

“In other news, another man has popped up on our superhero radar. As of this moment no one has seen this mysterious crusader, but terrifying sounds have been connected to small mugging crime scenes and a huge figure running away as the cops arrive…”

What was this? A story about him? Already? Perfect! His plan was starting to work. Phase 1: Some well-placed appearances to draw the public’s eye, was completed. Next was Phase 2: The defeating of a major criminal as a complete introduction to the city. Soon everyone would know that Pterodactyl Man was there to help them. Then he would be invited to the Strong Hands and his life would take a whole new direction.

“I have to practice my cry.” He says as he runs to the bathroom to stand in front of his mirror.

His apartment was soon filled with an obnoxious sound. It sort of sounded like an eagle mixed with a child’s scream.  He believed to be what a Pterodactyl’s cry would sound like, hence the name.  He had worked tirelessly, through blood and tears, to make his suit. I was brown and gray, effective camouflage for the city, and made wings with fabric connecting his ankles to his wrists.  It was the coolest thing that had ever been created in the world. 

“Oh yeah.” He said to his reflection, “This plan is going to work. My life will be so much more very soon now.”

He stayed in the bathroom for another two hours. His cry continued to fill the tiny apartment.  When he had first started practicing at that apartment he was worried that the neighbors would complain about the noise. But he had been there for a year now and no one had told him to keep it down. He must be surrounded by old people or people who can’t hear well, there was no other explanation.

He had paused to start making his dinner when he realized that the city had been plunged into chaos.

“Breaking news, chaos has taken over the downtown area. There was a bomb that went off early this evening in the Stanton bank building and a mass of masked marauders got a fast hold of the block.  Police have been trying to break through the criminal barricade, with no luck so far. We have just received information that the Strong Hands have tried to apprehend some of the men and break through into the interior of the bank with no luck so far.  They have set up a temporary base of operations just outside the blocks radius and are working closely with police to avoid casualties.  We have also received a broadcast from inside the bank by the groups supposed leader…”

The screen flipped to a video that looked like a bad YouTube video.  The man on the video was quite disturbing. He had heavy makeup on and seemed to have bigger ears than Prince Charles.

 

“Good evening precious citizens!” His voice had a heavy arrogance to it and what only could be described as mania. “I am Captain Eardrums, your new overlord. As you can see, my men and I have many hostages and if the police don’t BACK OFF, I will have to start killing them, one by one.  Your heroes have tried to make their way in, but they will never succeed.” He said this last part while tapping his enormous ears. He must be very proud of them, just another sign to show that he was completely nuts.

“This is great!” Pterodactyl Man screeched, his dinner left forgotten. “This could be my chance. I can prove myself tonight by defeating Captain Eardrums and make my way into the future I was destined to have!” He started to bustle about his apartment, picking up pieces of brown and gray fabric as he went.  

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“I’ve told you once and I will tell you once again, there is no way we can get close to that building.  This jerk…” Dragon’s Breath started.

“Captain Eardrums.” Black Belt Matt interrupted.

“Whatever! He can somehow always hear us coming. It doesn’t matter how stealthy we are or what we do, he chases us out every time.” Dragon’s Breath finished.

“He obviously has super hearing.” Heat Wave supplied, supporting his brother’s statements.

“Then what do you suggest we do, huh?” Missouri Madame snapped. She hadn’t been this frustrated during a fight since the 1999 epic battle. “Set the building on fire to kill all of the criminals as well as the hostages? Because that’s all you two can offer right now. Saying how impossible this task is, isn’t helping anyone.” She turned away from them to study the building’s layout for the 26^th time.

“We need a new plan. There must be a way to make it so he can’t hear us coming.” Heat Wave said.

“I think I may be able to help with that.” Came a pompous voice from the shadows.

The Strong Hands turned to see who had spoken and were met with the strangest sight any of them had ever seen.

A gangly young man was standing there with his arms stretched out to either side of him.  His cheap fabric clung to his slim body and made what were supposed to be wings, apparently, by connecting his wrists and ankles together.  Because of that, the man had to move his arms and legs very synchronized to even walk properly.

“Who the heck are you?” Black Belt Matt asked shortly. His mouth was hung open in derision. 

“I am Pterodactyl Man. I believe I have been making a splash on the public news waves.” Pterodactyl Man laughed. He had marched up to the group to see that all of them were looking at him in bewilderment. “And I have the answer to your problem.”

“How do you even know what the problem is? You just got here.” Dragon’s Breath mused.

“Oh that. Well I may or may not have been listening to your conversation just now because I was wondering how to make a proper entrance.” He grinned at them as if what he had just said wasn’t the most ridiculous thing they had ever heard.

“Get lost poser, we have too much to worry about right now.” Missouri Madame sighed, once again returning to the designs.

“Let’s hear him out.” Heat Wave said, moving around the table to stand closer to Pterodactyl Man.

“You can’t be serious?” His brother asked astonished.

“What can we lose?” Heat Wave replied, looking at his brother. “So tell us, what is this grand solution you have?”

“My cry.” Pterodactyl Man beamed.

“Your cry?” Black Belt Man asked in obvious disbelief.

“Yeah, I can sound like a Pterodactyl.” He stated, as if that was completely obvious. Did he really want them to believe that he was part Pterodactyl?

“Show us.” Heat Wave commanded, crossing his arms in front of him.

That was when he made the sound. Sure it was screechy and kind of loud, but not nearly enough to solve the current hostage problem.

“See, what did I tell you? He’s a total hack.” Missouri Madame declared, not once glancing up from the building plans.

However, Dragon’s Breath and Heat Wave were looking at each other.

“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Heat Wave asked his brother.

“Oh yeah.” Dragon’s Breath said. He marched up to the nearest cop he could find and grabbed his megaphone, and came back.

“Missouri Madame, what entrance have you found that we haven’t tried yet?” Heat Wave asked, leaving Pterodactyl Man to stand alone outside their command center, trying to figure out if he had saved the day, or just embarrassed himself.

“There is a secret entrance that is reserved for the bank president around the back.” She stated, looking at her partners as if they had gone crazy.

“Perfect, here is that plan…”

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They were all in position.  Pterodactyl Man was as close to the building as he could get, standing on top of a cop car. All cameras were pointed in his direction and onlookers were shouting that the cops had let another weirdo break through. They didn’t faze him though.  He was needed and this was his moment of glory.

He placed the megaphone to his lips and projected his cry as loud as he could.  That year of practice had really paid off.

He kept going, only to stop to take another breath to produce even more terrible screeches into the night.  Everyone around him had their hands clenched to their ears.

Soon, there were people running out of the bank.  The goons that had set up the barricade ran away. Their plan had obviously failed, and the last thing they wanted was to get arrested.  The police charged forward to get the civilian hostages and move them into safety.  Pterodactyl Man continued his deluge until the Strong Hands were seen exiting the building.  Dragon’s Breath and Heat Wave were carrying a very bloody Captain Eardrums and the day was saved.

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The aftermath was just as chaotic as the actual catastrophe.  Ambulances were bombarded with victims and were treating shock as fast as they possibly could. The heroes however had other plans.  They had snuck away in the confusion, mostly to avoid the pesky reporters. They had dragged a very puffed up Pterodactyl Man with them.

“Wow man, I didn’t think that would actually work.” Black Belt Matt exclaimed as they walked down back alleys towards home.

“Yes, thank you Pterodactyl Man. We couldn’t have done it without you.” Heat Wave said, clapping the unlikely hero on the shoulder.

“I was wrong about you, you really did save the day.” Missouri Madame said, smiling towards Pterodactyl Man.

He beamed with pride. This really was the start to his destiny.